Paradise
by enefea
Summary: Naraku has been defeated a year ago. The well had been sealed. Kagome was left in the Sengoku Jidai and her mate is taking care of her. It is a perfect life... but not for Kagome.
1. Default Chapter

**Paradise**

An Inuyasha fanfiction

By: voice of arcadia

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or the song Paradise. As we all know, Inu and co. belong to Rumiko Takahashi. And, well… that lady isn't me. The song 'Paradise' does not belong to me. It belongs to Vanessa Charlton and is included in her album, **Be not Nobody**. Sue me and die!

_once upon a year gone by_

_she saw herself give in_

She woke up, woken by the same way she was woken up during the past year… woken by the same nightmare that keeps on haunting her. Her breath was coming in short, shallow gasps, cold sweat running through her forehead, her clothes clinging to her body and strands of her raven-black hair was sticking to her pale face. She stared at the dark ceiling; the patches of moonlight that escaped the grasps of the thick curtains dancing on the walls make it look darker and the room even colder. She did not dare move nor make a sound for fear that the person beside her will wake up. Her tears were threatening to fall… but she did not dare release it… for fear that her so-called 'koi' would smell her tears. She closed her eyes, placing an arm over her forehead.

_every time she closed her eyes_

_she saw what could have been_

However, as soon as she closed her eyes, flashes of the nightmare… of the past… her past… came back to her. She once again witnesses the day her world changed… the day her life became unworthy living… the day her world ended… her Armageddon.

The day started pretty badly. The well, the only thing that lets her go to the past… her only way home… suddenly sealed itself trapping her in the Sengoku Jidai. She was desperate that day, so lonely. She cried. Even Shippou, Sango and the others could not stop her from crying. She was in this desperate state that Naraku came asking for, wanting to claim the Shikon shards that they have in their possession.

So… on that day. Everything was settled. That day witnessed the war between Naraku versus their group, the Western Lands and its allies. Yes, Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha finally settled their differences and helped each other to defeat one common enemy: Naraku. As it turned out, they claimed victory. However… however…

She opened her eyes suddenly, not wanting to see what came next… but failed. Though she opened her eyes, the scenes that came next kept playing in her mind. She witnessed as her truly beloved die in the hands of his brother. And that brother was the one who currently lays beside her… the one that has claimed her as his own.

_well nothing hurt and nothing bleeds_

_when covers tucked in tight_

She was about to leave the bed in hope of taking a walk to calm her senses when an arm shot out and grabbed her arm so hard that the nails began to break her ivory skin, drawing her blood. She mentally scolded herself for being so careless. She froze as a pair of arms encircled her waist. "Where are you going, koi?" the silver-haired man asked. "I— I… to the kitchen. I think… I need a glass of water." She said. "Be sure that… I will find your scent there in the morning…," the man said, his tongue licking the bite mark that forever marks her as his. She shuddered despite her thick sleeping kimono. "Mochiron." She said, getting out of bed and out of the room.

_funny when the bottom drops how she forgets to fight… to fight_

She set down the half-consumed glass of water on the kitchen counter. She took a deep, calming breath and closed her eyes, welcoming the images that were unwanted a while ago.

FLASHBACK

"Kagome-chan… don't cry… it will be okay…" Sango said, trying her best to calm down her best friend that was more of a sister to her for the past four years. "Okay? How can you say that? Is it okay that I won't be able to come back home?" Kagome said, anger and hurt clearly heard in her voice, tears falling endlessly from her eyes like the cold, icy rain that continued to fall outside Kaede's hut. "Kagome-chan… I understand how you…" Sango said but Kagome quickly retorted sharply. "Understand? Yeah right! How can you understand how I feel? How can any of **you** know and understand how **I** feel?" Kagome replied harshly, "It's not like you've given, sacrificed **four** years of your life to some place that is not your home!" Everyone in the hut fell silent as Kagome went on.

Miroku sat with his back on the wall, his eyes looking at anything but the young miko. Shippou was on Kagome's lap, trying his best to calm down the person he considered as his mother. Sango was sitting in front of Kagome and had a very hurt look on her face as she felt the pain her best friend was experiencing. Inuyasha was just standing behind Kagome, wearing a very annoyed expression.

"Keh, stop shouting bitch! It's not like someone died or something!" Inuyasha said, very, **very** angry. Sango looked at Inuyasha. Kagome was about to reply when she heard something she really hates. "Feh, if you were just as strong, as powerful and as smart as Kikyou the well wouldn't have sealed. Worthless replacement." Inuyasha muttered. Everyone heard. Kagome stood up and faced Inuyasha.

"Well, that's it! It's always been Kikyou this and Kikyou that. I cannot believe you are **that** dense! Why don't you accept that that girl is not living and has betrayed you for your greatest enemy, Naraku? Let me tell you this… **I** am no replacement! **I** am not a worthless piece of reincarnation of someone named Kikyou. If you really want her then, fine! Why don't you just go off with that dead bitch and live all your life rotting in hell!" and with those words, Kagome Higurashi ran out of the hut not caring about the icy rain that was falling on her… or the pair of eyes that was following her.

"You baka! How dare you say that to Kagome-chan!" Sango said, Hiraikotsu ready in her hands. "Sango-sama is right, Inuyasha. You knew what she was going through is hard, so why did you say that?" Miroku said. "Inuyasha, you really are a worthless hanyou! If something happens to Kagome, it's all your fault." Sango said as she was about to go out the door in hope of following Kagome, "Shippou-chan, Houshi-sama, are you coming with me?" The said two had just about time to say their approval when a scream pierced the air.

'Kagome!' Inuyasha thought, 'But wait… this presence…' Inuyasha's eyes widened. "What is it Shippou?" the houshi asked the kitsune cub. "It's Naraku!" both the kitsune and inu hanyou replied at the same time. "Eh?" came out Sango and Miroku's surprised replies… they have not felt Naraku's presence.

END OF FLASHBACK

She opened her eyes, staring at the full moon beyond the kitchen's windows. She finally decided to go outside to have a little walk. 'To hell with him!' she thought as a vision of her mate suddenly came into mind.

_as darkness quickly steals the light_

_that shined within her eyes_

She shivered slightly as a cold, slight breeze blew. Still… she made no move to go back to the palace with cold walls she is forced to call home… but only serves as her prison in this era. She took a walk in the gardens, admiring the beautiful flowers that she passed, wondering how such beautiful things can live in a place of icy coldness. Within a few minutes, she reached the lake that was concealed in a mini-forest inside the palace gates. She sat on the banks, admiring the beauty of the moon. Again, she wondered… how could something so beautiful be a symbol of someone who is so cold?

She looked at her reflection on the waters. 'I have changed… so much…' she thought as the same face, eyes and hair met her face… but with a more mature sense about them. She sighed. It was getting colder.

As she was about to get up, she felt a presence just behind her. Her eyes widened in fear. "I thought you said you were going to the kitchen. Why is it that you are here?" her mate's voice suddenly sounded behind her. "I… I…" she said, trying to explain but she was quickly silenced as he grabbed her arm and pulled her towards him. "Are you trying to disobey me?" he said softly, menacingly. She shook her head, "No." "Then why?" he said.

Before she was given a change to answer, he tore her sleeping kimono, leaving her naked and exposed to the cold, midnight air. He licked the bite mark. "This is the proof that you are **MY** mate. You will follow whatever I say and you will not lie to me." he said, his hands suddenly all over her. She could not say anything, fearful of what he would do to her.

Then, he shed his clothes and thrust inside of her, not caring about her cries of pain, her pleas of him to stop or the tears that were falling from her eyes. He just took her there and then. As he released his seed into her, he once again bit her neck. After what he had done, he stood up and put on his clothes. He kneeled next to her nude form lying on the ground. He touched the new mark on her neck. "You are mine. I am your master. You will follow whatever I tell you. If you disobey me again, you will be given punishment." he murmured to her. With those words, the Lord of the Western Lands left his mate.

_she slowly swallows all her fears_

_and soothes her mind with lies_

She slowly picked herself from the ground… pulling the torn pieces of cloth she once used as a sleeping kimono closer to her body in hope of protecting herself from the biting breeze. She shuddered as a strong wind blew… tears beginning to sting her eyes. 'Why? Why does it have to be like this?' she thought, feeling anger and sorrow at the same time.

FLASHBACK

"What is it Inuyasha?" Kagome asked as they suddenly stopped. It is not like Inuyasha to stop suddenly while they were walking. Normally, he was the one who wants to hurry up with their journey. Instead of answering, Inuyasha just gripped the handle of Tetsusaiga tight. "Is it Naraku?" Kagome asked as she felt a strong youki approaching them. "Iie… it's Sesshoumaru." He said, looking up at the clear, blue sky. And, as sure as he was, there came Sesshoumaru flying in the skies, accompanied by three other youkai, Jaken and two others they did not know.

As Sesshoumaru and his companions landed, Kagome felt Inuyasha suddenly tense. "What do you want now, Sesshoumaru?" Inuyasha asked angrily, "If you want the Tetsusaiga, just give it up. You can't even touch it." "I see you are as always, Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru said merely in his unemotional voice. Everyone was shocked. There was no hidden hatred in his voice. He looked at Inuyasha's companions. "I see you have your friends with you. Set up camp first and I will tell you what I want." He said.

After a few minutes, when they have finished starting the camp and exchanging pleasantries, the group stated their talk. "So, what is it that you want, Sesshoumaru?" Inuyasha asked, still angry. Before he answered, he looked at the two taiyoukai. "Mochiron, Sesshoumaru-sama." Both of them said and left the group. When the two other taiyoukai were gone, the others saw a slight change in him… as if the cold façade he had was finally beginning to fall. "Inuyasha, I have come here to ask you something." He said with a neutral look on his face.

"Ask, huh? Or is it demand?" Inuyasha said sarcastically. "Mou, Inuyasha. Do you not see Sesshoumaru is being nice to you? Wouldn't you at least act civil?" Kagome said as Miroku and Sango nodded their approval. "Why do you care about it bitch?" Inuyasha replied. Well, that did it. Kagome muttered the spell and Inuyasha found himself sprawled to the ground. Shippou was laughing at Inuyasha while Sango and Miroku rolled their eyes, wondering why Inuyasha hadn't even mature in the passed years. Sesshoumaru, on the other hand, had an amused expression on his face.

After the spell wore off and Inuyasha once again assumed a sitting position, they started the conversation once again with Inuyasha slightly polite than before. "So… Inuyasha, I am here to say that I, Sesshoumaru, will help in the fight against Naraku." The Lord of the Western Lands stated. Everyone was shocked for the hundredth time that day. "Why do you want to help us defeat Naraku?" Kagome asked, curious as to what his reasons were.

Sesshoumaru simply smiled, earning more than shocked glances from everyone. "Kagome-sama, am I right?" he asked her, continued when Kagome nodded her head, "Naraku has hurt one that belongs to me, and I will not forgive him for it. He has clearly defied me." Before someone got a chance to ask anything, he continued. "Besides, Inuyasha is my brother. He is the Prince of the Western Lands by birthright. Would not it be right, that I help my brother in this fight?"

That day, Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru settled their difference. Sesshoumaru promised to help them… and so did the allies of the Western Lands. That day marked the end of the dispute between the brothers...

… Or so they thought…

No one expected what was to come after everything regarding Naraku was settled.

-

'Inuyasha, we did it!' Kagome thought as she drifted back to consciousness. Finally, after so many years, Naraku has been defeated. She slowly raised herself from the ground, mindful of the pain in her body and of the slight headache that has been growing by the second. She looked around her. The clearing that has served as the battleground had a few craters in them, some remains of youkai were left though mostly were purified by the blasts of miko energy she released during the fight.

She looked for her companions. Shippou was just beside her, Miroku about 25 feet to her left, Sango was about 10 feet to her front with Kirara, Kohaku was just about a foot or two from Sango, Kouga and the three other wolf youkai were about 40 feet to her right. 'Strange…' she thought, 'Where are Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru?' She thought they might have been purified by her energy but it was impossible. The many times she has used her purification energy, Inuyasha was not affected. Sesshoumaru has Tensaiga, and that sword protects him from such things that go in league with purification energy, well… at least that was what he explained.

She was about to do a search when she felt two youki… two familiar youki behind her. She turned around and saw the brothers she was looking for. Odd… but the two seemed fighting. She was about to call out to the two of them when she saw Sesshoumaru thrust Toukijin into Inuyasha's body. Her eyes widened and she felt herself shiver in fear. 'No…' she thought as Inuyasha's lifeless body hit the ground. She ran towards him, not caring even though her body hurt like hell. "Inuyasha…" she said, tears coming freely from her eyes.

Everyone was awake by the time she reached Inuyasha. They were all shocked as to what Sesshoumaru has done. They had thought that he had change. "He is dead, my dear miko." He said. A few minutes were all it took for her friends to fall. She turned to her friends abruptly and saw Sesshoumaru killing all of them. "No!" she screamed as she let out an energy blast… but it was no use. Tensaiga has protected Sesshoumaru. Suddenly, Sesshoumaru was next to her. He injected her with poison, only enough to let her fall unconscious. "You are mine now, miko." She heard him say before she completely succumbed to the cold darkness.

END OF FLASHBACK

She looked at the moon again. 'How can he be so mean?' She thought, 'How can he be so heartless?' "How?" she whispered into the wind, hoping to hear it answer. She got up slowly, but before she reached the exit of the mini-forest, she collapsed.

+ End of Chapter One +


	2. part 2

** Paradise**

An Inuyasha fanfiction

By: voice of arcadia

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or the song Paradise. As we all know, Inu and co. belong to Rumiko Takahashi. And, well… that lady isn't me. The song 'Paradise' does not belong to me. It belongs to Vanessa Charlton and is included in her album, **Be not Nobody**. Sue me and die!

Before I go on with the fiction, I would like to tell those who reviewed this fanfiction of mine. When I checked my mail I just stared and thought, 'wow'. This is my first time to get five reviews within only a few days of posting. Again, arigatou gozaimasu minna-san!

Spiritual Destiny - thank you very much.

Apricot – uhmmm…. 

Me (no, not me but someone called 'me') – I don't think I can revive Kagome's friends… but they will somehow appear later on. Don't worry about Rin, she's here in this fanfic. Jaken… kill him? Nah, Inuyasha will not be the same without Jaken.

johnnie mae – thanks!

Ami – thanks for liking my fic. Trust me, I don't want to make Sess-chan act so evil and cruel. I mean, well, I really like Sess-chan and doing this fic really kills me when I write it. But well… we cannot deny the fact that his cold and uncaring, right? ^_^;;

PS: And, oh yeah, this chapter is gonna be long.

=========================

**PARADISE**

Song by: Vanessa Charlton

Story by: voice of arcadia

Rating: PG-13/ R

Genre: Angst

==========================

_well all she wants and all she needs_

_are reasons to survive_

She woke up with the sound of scurrying feet. She immediately closed her eyes as soon as she opened them… the curtains were drawn allowing the bright glare of sunlight enter the room. "Okaa-san… nee, okaa-san!" she heard a voice said, a girl's. "Okaa-san… wake up!" another voice said, this time it was a boy's. "Yuki, Kaze, do not disturb your mother." Her mate's voice said. She felt a small amount of fear tug at her. She slowly opened her eyes. "Okaa-san! You're awake!" the boy and the girl both exclaimed at the same time. "Stop it you two! You're choking me!" she replied but still not trying to make a move to get the children off her. 

(A/N: Uhmmm… okay. So, doesn't really fit, huh? I mean the children. So, I'm going to play with fact, okay? Therefore, as not to make you confused, in this story, youkai mature and grow very fast when young but age slowly after gaining ten human years in appearance. That means learning to walk and talk early. So, a youkai of one human year = a human of six human years. And...hell! I don't know! Please bear with me for a while, okay? ^_^;)

Yuki and Kaze were twins. Kaze had raven-black hair so much like his mother and had the same golden-colored eyes as his father. He also has the same markings of a great taiyoukai as his father but though they look very much the same, Kaze does not have the control of emotions his father has. Yuki, on the other hand, has stormy blue-gray eyes, much like her mother's, with the same depth and intensity. As her name puts it, her hair is silvery-white that even contrasts the snow the falls during winter. Like his brother, she has the same markings as her father but her crescent moon has the addition of a star. Both brother and sister possess the warm characteristics of their mother and the abilities of their parents. 

Though both were supposed to be the result of a union between a human and a youkai, the two does not posses the characteristics of a hanyou. They are not what Inuyasha was. At first, it all had been a wonder. But, as she was reading in the library one day, she read that her and her mate's union was one of a kind. It is said that when a youkai mates with a miko of great power, the child born will always be youkai. So then, her worry that her mate would kill their children quickly disappeared.

She smiled as she looked at them… her children. But her smiled quickly disappeared as she remembered what happened last night. She looked down... and saw that her body was again covered with a sleeping kimono. She let out a sigh. "Kaze-kun, Yuki-chan, what's the fuss about?" she asked them. The two of them smiled. "Come okaa-san! We need to show you something!" Kaze said, tugging at her arm. "Un. Okaa-san, we want to show you something!" Yuki said in delight. Before she could say anything, her mate took over. "Kaze, Yuki, your mother has just woke up." Her mate said. "Demo Otou-san…" both said, giving their best puppy face. Still… her mate wasn't the one to take those things. "Later. After your Mother have finished with breakfast." 

After the children left, her mate faced her. The intensity of his gaze was so great... she could only look at her hands that was folded in her lap. "What do you want Sesshoumaru?" she asked him, careful not to sound cold yet also not to sound warm, her face devoid of any emotion. Her mate sat next to her. He took her chin and forced her face to look at him. "Look at me when you are talking." He said. "What do you want?" she said, suddenly feeling angry for some reasons. He smirked.

'Uh-oh… this was **NOT** a good sign.' She thought, her anger being forced into hiding by the other emotion she came to know very well in the past year. Fear. "Nothing, koi. I am just here to remind you that if you disobey me again or try to take the children away… you know what will happen…" he reminded her, his other hand making a slight cut on her throat. She felt blood came out. He licked the wound when the first drop of blood came out. He let go of her and walked out of the room. She shuddered. Unconsciously, her hand came to her throat. The wound has vanished.

_a day in which the sun will take_

_her artificial light… her light_

After she has finished her breakfast, her children led her to the garden. On their way there, she saw her 'beloved' mate talking to Ryuu, the taiyoukai of the East, the same one who was with Sesshoumaru when the brothers had their so-called truce. Strange, it was like they had a problem of sort. Still… she did not want her koi to catch her eavesdropping so she continued as if she saw nothing.

"Okaa-san, you can take it off now!" Yuki said as we arrived to a place that was a distance from the castle. She did not know why, but the children insisted that she was to be blindfolded. When she asked why, they said it was a surprise. 'As a silly question and you get an obvious answer.' she thought. Still, though she was a little nervous about it, she agreed. 

Her mind snapped back to reality when Kaze took off the blindfold. As she opened her eyes, she gasped. It was a field of lavender. She felt her eyes water as she remembered a thing from the past… her past that she was… ordered to forget.

========================= FLASHBACK =========================

"Kagome-chan… what's that?" Sango asked as Kagome had in her arms violet flowers. They stopped in a field that particular day, due to Kagome's insistence. "This?" Kagome replied, "From my time, this is called Lavender. Though I don't know what you call it here." 

"La-ven-der. Ok." Sango said offhandedly. "So, I take it that you like that, Kagome-sama?" Miroku asked as she saw Kagome make wreaths of the flower called Lavender. "Yeah! I love it! It's my favorite!" Kagome exclaimed happily, her attention focused on the flowers. 

"Eh? How did this became your favorite? I mean, that other flower we saw… the one that you called… Camellia… is much more beautiful to me." Sango said. "Well… I know that. It's not as beautiful as other flowers but… that's what I like about it. It's simplicity." Kagome explained. Sango nodded. "And besides, from a story I heard, I love what the Lavender symbolizes." She said. "That is?" Miroku asked, curious as what was so important about it.

She looked at them and smiled somewhat sadly. "The Lavender is a flower that symbolizes a love that will forever be waiting no matter how long it will be… even if it meant waiting for all eternity." she said (A/N: guys, think about Lavender. The same Lavender where dragonruler212 got the idea for the fanfiction "Lavender"). The youkai exterminator and houshi stared at Kagome, knowing exactly how she feels. 

Unknown to them, Inuyasha was listening. He remembered when he went to the other side of the well to remind Kagome that her three days has just expired and was planning to take her back to the Sengoku Jidai. He could still remember that day clearly, as though it was just yesterday.

He has just emerged from the well. He sensed that Kagome was not at her house but somewhere nearby. He decided to go to Kagome. As he neared the place, he saw that Kagome tending to small, violet flowers that seemed to be out of place against the green grasses. He saw her stood up and face him. "Sorry Inuyasha, I forgot about the time." she apologized, "Here, take this… as a sign of my apology." She handed him some of the flowers. He raised an eyebrow as he saw her blush a slight shade of pink. He was about to ask her why when she turned around and went towards the direction of the Bone Gobbling Well. "Forget it Inuyasha. Let's go back." He heard her say as she left him standing in the clearing.

His eyes widened at what he just heard from Kagome. He knew what she meant. He was shocked to say the least. 'So… that's what it means…' he thought. He was surprised to know that even though he had chosen Kikyou over her many times, she would still be waiting.

========================= END OF FLASHBACK =========================

"Okaa-san, are you alright?" Kaze asked her as she suddenly became quiet. "Eh? I'm okay, don't worry." She said, trying to bring back the cheerful mask she has placed but, though the children believed it, she has failed miserably. 

"Why don't you… why don't you go and play? I'll just watch from here." she said, fighting the urge to let go of any of the tears she felt that was about to fall. Yuki and Kaze looked at her suspiciously, smelling the salty tears but as she gave them a smile, they decided to go as she says.

As she saw that her two children were now out of sight and so caught in their game, she decided to let go of all the feelings that were trapped inside of her. As the tears fall from her eyes, hope slipping through her fingers, she wondered. 'Why does everything bad happen to me? Inuyasha… why did you leave me?'

_one more day in paradise_

_one last chance to feel alright… alright_

She tensed and quickly wiped away her tears as she felt someone approaching them. She slowly stood up and faced the path from to the palace. She blinked as she saw a girl coming from the path. It was Rin. She chuckled to herself. 'Gods, am I becoming THIS paranoid?' she asked herself. Rin waved to her and she waved back. 

"Hi Rin-chan! I didn't know you were coming back today?" she asked as the girl who was turning thirteen neared her. Rin pouted. "Okaa-san, I wrote to you, remember? I told you that if I did not come the day of the full moon, I will come the next day!" her adopted daughter said. "Eh? You wrote me?" she asked. "Yeah, don't you remember?" Rin replied. She thought for a while and remembered.

It was a week ago. Yuki, Kaze and she were in the library with Sesshoumaru. Just then, Jaken entered the room saying that a letter arrived from Rin who was studying under the care of a miko at a village inside the Western territories. Sesshoumaru proceeded to his study, which was just in the next room. Annoyed that she wasn't able to read it, she told the children to go outside in the gardens and play. 

Her thoughts were snapped back to reality as she heard the children's laughter. "… will you come?" Rin's voice said. "Huh? What?" she asked, puzzled. Rin pouted. "Okaa-san, you weren't listening!" Rin accused. "Gomen, Rin-chan." she replied, "So… what is it? You're dating someone already?" Rin blushed a shade of red at her question and teasing voice. "Okaa-san, it isn't like that!" Rin protested. "Okay.. so what is it?" she asked again.

"Uhmmm… okaa-san, will you come to the village with me?" Rin said. "I don't know Rin-chan…" she said hesitantly. "I mean, the miko-sama and the other villagers say that you were one the protector of the Shikon no Tama in the legends…" Rin said uncertainly.

'Shikon no tama... but how…?' she thought unbelievingly, 'It isn't possible! No one could have known!'

========================= FLASHBACK =========================

Her cheeks were stinging, eyes prickled by the tears she adamantly refused to shed. The curtains were closed, casting a very dark shadow, making the well-furnished room look even mush worse than a prison dungeon. Her mate had left a few moments ago. She slowly dropped to the floor and placed a hand to touch her cheek that was a little swollen due to what her mate had done. 

She touched the chain on her neck, the one containing the Shikon no Tama and smiled ruefully. 'This jewel… you… you brought me this much pain…' she thought, 'But… I don't think I can blame you… I have been weak… I can't do anything… I should've helped him and my friends…' Her vision slightly blurred and drops of her tears fell on the jewel.

The jewel glowed, as if trying to calm her thoughts. Suddenly, an idea come to her. She closed her eyes and called on the jewel, finally deciding what to wish for. A bright light filled the room. When she opened her eyes, the jewel disappeared from her hands, in front of her was a woman with raven black hair much similar to her own but straighter and emerald green eyes. The woman was wearing a simple, black kimono and a silver obi. 

"You are… the protector of the jewel?" the woman asked while Kagome nodded, "I am the Shikon no Tama." "You are the jewel?" Kagome asked, not believing what she heard. "Hai, I am. Although I take the appearance of the late priestess, Midorko, I contain the spirit of the Shikon, one that has been desired by all." The jewel replied, "What is it that you desire, dear miko?" "I…" she started, "I want to bring back my friends and Inuyasha." 

"I am sorry, but that cannot be done. Not only it is selfish but it can ruin the balance and the destiny the Fates has woven. Also, your other desire to kill your mate cannot be done for not only is it a selfish and dark desire, it would change the past and would ruin the future. Aside from that, many hearts will be broken, so manly lives will vanish." The jewel said, "Be calm, miko. Calm yourself and do not think of what has brought you pain. For if you do, I will not be sealed and will continue to exist and the same thing about Naraku may happen again. Cleanse your thoughts miko."

She did as what the jewel advised. After a few minutes, she decided. "I wish for all the memories about the Shikon no Tama, Naraku, and all that happened all that was involved in the battle and died be forgotten. That everything that happened in years of the quest for finding the Shikon be gone and forgotten and make all of it a myth, something that could be forgotten with the passage of time. That everyone and everything will forget except me." She said, determination shining through her eyes. 

"Miko, do you know the consequence of this desire?" the jewel asked, shocked as to what Kagome would wish. "Yes." She said. "By wishing this, you do know that even your memory will be gone from your family and friends from the future? By wishing this, even the memory of your mate's brother and your friends be gone from all the people in this Era? By wishing this, you will have to carry a very heavy task?" the jewel queried. Though uncertainty was seen in her stormy blue-gray eyes, she nodded. A few moments, a very bright light was seen to cover all of the lands, both in the Sengoku Jidai and in the future. Kagome passed out and the spirit of the Shikon slowly vanished.

========================= END OF FLASHBACK =========================

"… the miko-sama would really want to meet you Okaa-san and asked if you would go with me the next time I return. So… will you come?" Rin's voice sounded, making her thoughts drift back to reality. "I don't know Rin-chan. I need to ask your Otou-san if it would be okay." she said, knowing full well that Sesshoumaru would not let her go. "Demo Okaa-san, why should you ask Otou-san?! I know that you're not doing anything here in the palace." Rin said. She was about to reply when she saw Rin look sad and heard her mutter something. "And besides, I know what he does to you, okaa-san. You should take a break first, get out of the palace or something." She just smiled. "It's okay Rin. He doesn't hurt me too much anyway. He's just scared that… he'll lose you, me, Yuki and Kaze." She said. Rin looked at her curiously. As she was about to explain, Jaken came.

_don't pretend to hold it in just push it out_

_don't you try to hold it in just let it out and_

_don't you try to hold it in you hold it in_

"Kagome-sama, Sesshoumaru-sama would like to speak to you. I was told to escort you to his study." The toad youkai said. 

A few years ago, this would have surprised her. But now, it was all too natural. Jaken, at first, did not accept that a mere human like her would be allowed in the great taiyoukai of the west's palace. But, being so kind to him, though he does not admit it for his growing respect for her, he had felt sorry for the human. 

He knew what his master was doing to her and for that, he felt pity. Yet, he also knew that she was a miko, a powerful one, and for that, she has gained his respect.

Jaken saw Rin look at the miko worriedly. He knew that the child also knows. The miko smiled. "Do not worry Rin, I will be okay. Look for the children for me and let them in after a an hour." She told Rin, "Jaken, let's go. He doesn't want to be kept waiting, right?"

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"Sesshoumaru-sama, she is here." Jaken called through the wooden door. "Let her in." came her mate's smooth reply. Before opening the door, Jaken looked at her with something akin to pity and sorry. She just smiled at him brilliantly in reply, making him wonder how such human can act happily yet being beaten by someone.

As the door opened, she saw her mate sitting in the table near the big window while Ryuu, the taiyoukai she has saw earlier, was standing near the window and, as she entered, looked at her hungrily. She mentally shook her head. She knew she has just imagined the look on the taiyoukai's eyes.

"Jaken, you may leave." Her mate's voice sounded and, with a quick bow and a 'Hai, Sesshoumaru-sama' Jaken left the room. After the door closed, she felt the atmosphere get heavier. Her mate suddenly looked at her with angry eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me?" his voice drawled out menacingly. "What do you mean?" I asked, not understanding what he was saying. "Why did you not tell me about the Shikon no Tama?" her mate asked her again. She was shocked. 'How did he know? Only I have the memory of what happened…' she thought, thinking of the day she made the wish on the Shikon. Still… she did not want anything be known

"The Shikon no Tama? Was it not the jewel of the legend that was said to have disappeared fifty years ago?" she asked innocently. Before her mate could answer, Ryuu retorted in anger. "Do not lie, miko! I know about your past! You were there, a year ago when Naraku, the evil half-breed died. You were the one who cleared the world with his existence! And you… You are the protector of the Shikon no Tama!" Ryuu said. 

"How can you say this? A year ago, I was in the village near the forest of Inuyasha. I was there helping the village miko, Kaede. I was in the company of Inuyasha and my friends. And I do not know of any Shikon but the Shikon in the legends!" she replied hotly. 

"Is it so, my dear mate?" her mate asked coldly. "Yes." She replied. "Then… why do I smell fear from you? And why do you lie?" he replied. "I…" she started but a hand came to her throat. "I have told you not to lie in front of me and the other lords, or have you forgotten." He asked. Trying hard not to make the tears spill, she nodded. "Now answer us truthfully, where is the Shikon?" Sesshoumaru asked her.

He let go of her to let her answer. She fixed her kimono first before answering. "If I know where the Shikon no Tama is, tell me… what will you do with it?" she asked. "We will you use it to finally unite all the lands." Ryuu replied. 

"I know that, Ryuu-sama. But what I am asking is how you will do it." She said. Both were silent. As she was about to speak, Sesshoumaru interrupted. "Just tell us where the Shikon is." He demanded. "The jewel has been sealed." She said. "What?" Ryuu asked incredulously.

"I mean it, the jewel has already been sealed." She replied calmly. "How? The jewel cannot be sealed, miko. You know that." the dragon youkai said, gritting his teeth. 

"A year ago, I have wished for something and as a result, the jewel was sealed." She simply said. Not controlling his anger anymore, Ryuu attacked her while her mate was just looking, knowing that it was a wise punishment for defying him and one of his greatest allies.

As Ryuu aimed for her, she dodged. Yet, though she was able to dodge the first attack, she could not the second one. His claws dug into her hip, making a very big wound. And from there, a pink jewel suddenly came out. She gasped at the realization that it was the Shikon no Tama. She fell to the ground, the jewel a mere inch from her outstretched hands. All of a sudden, the whole room glowed a bright blue.

Then, she was slowly lifted from the ground, her eyes changing to cerulean blue. The two taiyoukai was angered and attacked her. Before any of the attacks could land, blue light erupted from her hands and threw back the lords. With this achieved, her world suddenly turned black from the use of her power.

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She slowly drifted to consciousness. The rays of sunlight kissing her face makes her wake up and the soft call of the birds persuading her to fight off the clutches of sleep suddenly convinced her to open up her eyes. She sat up and looked around her. '

Where am I?' she thought to herself. "You are somewhere between the past and the future, somewhere between waking and sleeping, a place between living and dying. This is the place where I, Clotho, Lachesis and Atropos dwell." A voice, the Shikon's, sounded. She looked behind her and saw the woman she has seen about a year ago.

"What am I doing here?" she asked the Shikon. "I brought you here for I know that in that place, you will not be able to think properly." the Shikon replied. 

"Uhmmm… why did you bring me here?" she asked, feeling a little foolish. The spirit looked at her, obviously amused. "You called on me, remember? Your heart called to me. I thought you wanted to finally make your wish?" the Shikon asked. "Uhmm… well…" she said, uncertainly. 

The Shikon smiled. "You can think of it for as long as you want. You need not worry, the time you will spend here will be nothing but a mere second in the world of the living, no matter how long you wish to spend." The jewel said and turned as if about to leave. "Wait!" she cried out. "Yes?" it replied. "Well… I was just curious…" she started but the jewel knew what she means.

"You are curious about why the Lord Ryuu know about your identity and I after wishing the memories about it be erased am I correct?" the jewel said. She nodded. "I am sorry if I have deceived you, dear miko. But, on the last minute, the Fates decided that it is not right for only you to bear the memories of all those years and if only you will bear the memories of what that has happened, the balance will surely fail. So, in a final attempt, the Fates used the Sacred Tree to bring about a barrier on the lands within you have spent most of your times, particularly the village in forest of Inuyasha and the shrine where you lived." The jewel said.

"So you mean…?" she asked. "Yes. Your daughter Rin was sent to that village. Sesshoumaru, with his memories, might have not send Rin to that place but… because of your wish… he did not know." the jewel paused for a moment. She was going to was going to say something when the jewel continued. 

"And there was this family, who have moved from the village in the forest of Inuyasha to a place within the borders of the Eastern Lands, despite the objection of the other villagers. The people know that they possess a great knowledge, that when given to wrong hands, may once again start the same pain and agony that was the quest for the Shikon no Tama. Because of this, they have decided long ago that no one may ever leave the village."

"So, as it goes, the family left the village. And there, while Lord Ryuu was patrolling and the family was in the forest, he heard them talking about you and the power that you have and your control on me. He, as all youkai and human alike, could not resist this for all have the hunger for power. And with the fear that the other lands will take over, who was him to say no? When you saw them talking, it was about you and I. The Lord Ryuu had somehow persuaded the Lord Sesshoumaru and they called on you. And, not helping to the fact, was Lachesis' and Clotho's idea of a joke. They made a piece of the Lord Sesshoumaru's memories return. And now, I will leave you. Clear your mind first before deciding." The jewel looked at her for a minute and vanished, leaving her in solitude, finally giving her a time to herself she has very well-deserved.

After a few hours of serious thinking, she finally decided and called for the Shikon. "Yes? What is it? Have you finally decided?" the jewel asked. "Yes." She said with determination, "and I wish for…."

_once upon a year gone by_

_ she saw herself give in_

She slowly opened her eyes. The sound of the traffic below placed a smile to her face. She looked around her and saw her children, Yuki, Kaze and Rin. She slowly woke up Rin. "Rin-chan… wake up, Rin-chan…" she said gently. "Huh? What?" the girl said, her voice thick with sleep. "C'mon Rin-chan, we need to get Kaze-chan and Yuki-chan inside the house." She said. 

Slowly, Rin complied. As they neared the house, she was surprised that Rin did not asked her anything. Suddenly, the door opened to reveal a woman who was about in her thirties. "Kagome-chan! Welcome back!" the woman said, tears in her eyes.

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She smiled as she looked at the children that were sleeping. Her mother had brought in a cot so that Rin could sleep in her room. Kaze and Yuki were there on the bed, sleeping next to her. She slowly got up so as not to wake the children and stood near the window.

She sighed as she looked at the moon. It was a crescent. 'I wonder what's happening there…' she thought but then shook her head, 'He's in the past now. (A/n: well obviously!) He couldn't ruin my future. But…' she looked at the kids and remembered the conversation earlier.

========================= FLASHBACK =========================

"Kagome-chan! Welcome back!" the woman said, tears in her eyes. She hugged Kagome very tight, both of them crying very hard. After a few minutes, when they have calmed down, her mother looked at her companions. "And who are they, Kagome-chan?" she asked. "Well… This Rin-chan, Yuki-chan and Kaze-chan. They are my kids." She said. Her mother was surprised. "Eh? Inuyasha's?" her mother asked, thinking that Inuyasha and her daughter finally got together. "Iie, they are not Inuyasha's." she said, eyes still sad at the mention of his name. before her mother could ask another question, Yuki woke up. "Okaa-san, where are we? And who's that lady? She looks like you!" her daughter explained. Her mother laughed and let them all in the house.

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Dinner was a funny sight. Her mother was so delighted at the news that she was now a grandmother. Her brother was also happy that he has new playmates. However, the most funniest sight of all was her grandfather, grumbling in the table, saying that it was just a proof of how old he is now. Rin, however, was not as cheerful as before and was just sitting and not saying anything. 

After dinner, her mother talked to her. "Kagome-chan. Tell me, what happened? If it's not Inuyasha's, then who's is it?" her mother asked her seriously. "Well… they are mine and Sesshoumaru's children." She replied. "And, who is this Sesshoumaru?" her mother asked, "You haven't told me anything about him." "Sesshoumaru is Inuyasha's brother." She simply replied.

"His brother? Why? I thought you loved Inuyasha?" her mother said, "Did something happened to him?" "I…I…" she said and broke into tears. And then, after calming down, she told her mother the story about what happened.

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"Okaa-san… why are we here?" Yuki asked after she returned from her talk with her mother. She was brushing Yuki's hair. "Well… we are here to visit my family!" she replied cheerfully, "and to visit the place where I grew up." "But… okaa-san, where is otou-san?" Kaze asked. She paused for a while. "Uhmm… your otou-san is very busy right now. He had some business to do in the other lands that's why he couldn't come." She said. 

"But…" Yuki protested, "Why isn't Jaken with us?" She could not answer that question. Thankfully, Rin came to her aid. "Yuki-chan, Okaa-san said that Otou-san is very busy. And when he's busy, Jaken always go with him, right?" Rin said. Yuki and Kaze nodded, "Okay." "C'mon guys, it's time for sleep. You have to wake up early tomorrow so that I can show you around my place." She said.

After what seemed like hours, the children were finally asleep, except for Rin. "Okaa-san, tell me, what really happened to Sesshoumaru-sama?" Rin asked her. "Well, tell me, how much do you know about me?" she asked. "Well, many, I think. I know that you travel from the future to the past and was with a guy named Inuyasha that was Sesshoumaru-sama's half-brother." Rin replied, "I take it that we are in the future?" "Hai. Rin-chan, will you get angry at me when I say that we may never see Sesshoumaru-sama again?" she said worriedly. "What do you mean?"

"Well, do you recall the blue light while we were in the palace?" she paused and at Rin's nod continued, "well, as you know I am a miko. I am afraid that the sudden energy blast might have killed Sesshoumaru and Ryuu." Rin was shocked, "But…" "And Rin, You know of the Shikon right? I have told you before in your bed time stories that the Shikon was a jewel that can grant the wish of whoever holds it. And in this case I do. So, I wished for the Shikon to bring us here to the future and seal the path to the past, which is the Bone Gobbling Well." 

"But, what if the past catches up with us?" Rin asked. "Well, I don't we will see Sesshoumaru again. Like I told you, he might've been killed by the blast." She said, "are you angry at me, Rin-chan?" Rin was quiet for a minute. "I'm not mad at you Okaa-san, I'm just a little sad that we may not see Otou-san again." Rin said, pausing for a while, " I know what he does to you. You are very kind, Kagome-nee-chan, and I think that you deserve to be happy."

========================= END OF FLASHBACK =========================

She smiled as she looked at Rin. She was truly a kind child. 'But then… what if the past really catches up with the future?...' she thought, the image of the moon filling her mind.

_every time she closed her eyes_

_she saw what could have been_

A week has passed since she returned. Yuki and Kaze, with her miko magic, were disguised as humans and were enrolled to a school. Rin was enrolled to Souta's school. She, once gain, returned to school after her 'brain tumor' operation in England so her friends will not look up every hospital in Japan in hope to visit her. 

She was on her way to her locker when she bumped into a person. "Gomenasai. I didn't mean to." She said as she kneeled down and picked up the things she and the other person dropped. "Watch where you're going, bitch!" a gruff voice replied. She felt her blood boil. 

"I said I'm sorry! You deaf or just—" she said, looking at the person who she has just bumped into. But then, she stopped as a familiar face met her eyes. "I…" her voice trailed off. She must've been staring for when her eyes seemed to focus again, his hand was in front of her face. 

"You okay?" the guy asked. She nodded. "Hey Inuyasha! Let's go, we're gonna be late!" someone called. "Sure Miroku! Be there in a minute." Inuyasha replied, "Watch where you're going next time. What's you're name anyway?" "Uhmm… Higurashi, Higurashi Kagome." She said, as though in a trance. "Well, Higurashi. See ya." He said, leaving behind a very puzzled Kagome.

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Two months has passed since she met Inuyasha. They became friends and met his other friends, Miroku, Sango, Shippou and Kouga. She realized that they have the same personalities that they have in the past yet human in appearance thought she swore that she saw Kouga's, Inuyasha's and Shippou's fangs, Kouga's unbelievable speed and Inuyasha's a little more that natural strength. 

She also met up with her three girl friends, a few other classmates and Hojou. When they first saw her, they were very worried about her condition. They 'knew' that she had a surgery and afraid that she might overdo herself. She, however, told them that in the year that she was gone, she had recovered fully. They, of course, believed her. When they asked about the two-timing jerk she has for a boyfriend, she told them that they were now off. Though the girls say that it was good and despite the sunny face she showed them, she was hurting deep inside.

Today, she was going to meet Inuyasha and the others. She practically skipped as she made her way through the shrine grounds. Yuki and Kaze were doing their homework with the help of Rin and Souta. Surprisingly, Yuki, Kaze and Rin hadn't had a hard time in coping up with the future. She has finally told them that they may not see their father again. Though at first they were angry at her, they finally accepted the fact after Rin explained something to them.

As she was about to go down the shrine's steps, she heard someone called to her. She turned and saw that it was Hojou. "Higurashi-san, can I talk to you for a moment?" he asked her. She nodded. Why wouldn't she anyway? Hojou is her friend, he thinks they could be more, and there's nothing wrong with him, except from the fact that he always seem babbling when talking to her. 

Hojou led her near the Sacred Tree. "Higurashi-san, you are going somewhere, are you not?" he asked, back facing her. "Yeah." She said, shivering from a cold wind that blew from nowhere. Strange, it seems as though something's wrong with Hojou. "So I see, you have met my dear brother?" 'Hojou' said, the words 'dear' and 'brother' were spat like it contained the strongest and deadliest poison known to man. 

"What do you mean?" she asked. 'This is getting very weird. Hojou-kin doesn't even have a brother!' she thought. "Oh, you know what I mean, koi." He said. Then, her eyes widened. Suddenly, Hojou began to change. His black hair became long and changed to a silvery white, his eyes changed from dark blue to a golden yellow color while a crescent moon appeared on his forehead and magenta stripes on his face and wrist. "No…" she said, softly. 

"Yes, dear koi. Now, tell me, why did you even think that the weak blast you released five centuries ago killed me?" he asked. "But I though…" she said. "Fooled you, didn't I?" he replied. "What happened to Hojou?" she asked. "Hojou? Oh, you mean the stupid boy who thinks he can have what is mine?" he said, smiling menacingly, "Well, I rid the world of his disgusting presence."

"How could you do that?" she asked, getting only an evil smirk for an answer. "Now… what did I tell you about keeping the children away from me and escaping?" he asked, "If you returned, then I might've given you another chance. But, you made me wait for so long… I don't have any other choice…" Her eyes widened still. "Hmm… and you know what? Maybe I'll also get rid of my stupid brother and his friends… all over again. Oh, may I add to the list the good-for-nothing human I have taken under my wing who has betrayed me."

"Bastard! How can you do that! Why not leave Inuyasha and the others in peace! They haven't done anything to you in this lifetime!" she said, rage taking over her fear, "And if you ever think of laying a hand on Rin, I swear I'll send you to the seventh depth of hell! You've got no heart! And to think that she has helped you and had been loyal to you! It has been your fault why she does not even want to go back to the past!"

The taiyoukai smiled. She knew that smile, and it wasn't a good sign. Before she could react, she was pinned to the tree. She suddenly let go of her miko blasts… only to find that it didn't have any effect on him. The Tensaiga on his hip, absorbed the blasts. 'No…'

Before anything, she suddenly felt a pain in her stomach and blood oozed out. She looked down and saw that he had made a hole in her stomach. "I…" she murmured, eyes suddenly going black. Body falling to the ground. "Good bye, dear koi…" he said, turning his back on her, looking for the other people he intended 'No…' she thought and a very bright light erupted. 

He looked back and saw her being lifted off the ground. One of her arms pointed at him and he was surrounded by a blue light. he shouted in pain as the purifying blast took effect, the Tensaiga not taking the capacity of the energy. Moments later, the Taiyoukai of the West was gone.

It was said that when you die, you see all that has happened to you in the past and that was in her case. Somewhere between the realm of life and the realm of oblivion, all her life's events flashed through her eyes. She does not regret what she has chosen in her life… only unhappy that no one will be left for her children.

So… as everything died down, she nticed. She was given choices. Yet, there was no path to choose for escape. So then… what would she choose? Living a life like a princess with a chance to live forever yet treated as a captive, worse than a slave, given no rights and eternity promised to be full of agony? Or, living a life in the cruel world, beyond the walls of fantasy, given rights and dying freely with the thought that you lived your life into your own accord?

She chose the latter. 

And so… another flame of life was extinguished. Atropos has cut the threads of her life. Lachesis made another pattern and Clotho placed a new thread to weave.

'Gomenasai, Rin-chan, Yuki-chan, Kaze-chan, minna-san… I'm sorry…'

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A/N: Ei minna! How was it? Kinda lame, huh? Sorry, I told you that I'm in a writer's block. We've been very busy since it's the end of the school year and well, there are this different tests, aside from the finals today, that we have to take. And besides, currently, I am very angry, no, scratch that, pissed at some people in school. And when I'm angry I don't think I can write very well. So please, I really am sorry if the story's very lame. Oh yeah, please REVIEW!

Till next story,

Voice of Arcadia


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